"All I got" is LOGIC -- therefore, I have nothing...

[Dien Rice]

Originally Posted by Richard Dennis

TW,

I feel your pain. I used to be exactly where you are.

Example: As I once told my wife, it was 3 or 4 years after we got married before I began to understand how to talk to a girl. (And by then, it was too late ...)

Hi Richard,

Wow, great post!

I can totally relate!

I remember trying to talk to girls as a teenager... I would over-analyze everything I was going to say. Then afterwards, I would over-analyze everything I said.

My thought pattern was something like... "If I say this, then she'll think this, but if I say that, then she'll think that... What if she replies with this, then maybe I should say this, or perhaps that..." I'd try to "over-analyze" the whole thing...

I would approach talking to girls the same way I would approach a chess match! I would try to analyze all the possible "moves" (that is, all the things I could say), and all the possible responses!

What came through was obviously pretty bland, awkward - and it did nothing for helping to attract girls!

Finally... years later (as a university student)... I figured out that the problem was because I was over-analyzing everything!

Somehow, I learned to "let go" and "go with the flow"... And to stop over-analyzing!

And everything, when it came to talking with girls, more or less fell into place!

When it came to selling, I've been very influenced by Gordon's White Bread story...

As Gordon says in that story... "You can’t do anything well without enthusiasm!"

I think feeling genuine enthusiasm for what you're selling is half the battle. (If you can't be enthusiastic about what you're selling - you should probably be selling something else...)

You have to feel that enthusiasm at that moment, the moment you are doing the selling. And I believe it has to be genuine... (At least for me, since I'm a terrible actor!)

Logic is a part of it, too, but emotion (such as enthusiasm) can be a big part of the equation.

(Though it also depends on what products you're selling, as some cases, I think, are more "logical" sales than others... If a buyer wants to buy a widget, and if seller A is selling widgets for $20, and seller B sells identical widgets with a 20% discount, for $16, I think it is completely logical for a buyer to buy from seller B rather than seller A. Seller B might have also used "logic" to find or make widgets at a lower cost than seller A, which is why seller B can sell them at a lower price and still make a profit.)

Oops, I let my analytical side show for a moment there...

Best wishes,

Dien

[GordonJ]

Originally Posted by Dien Rice

Hi Richard,

Oops, I let my analytical side show for a moment there...

Best wishes,

Dien

And the reason why all those seduction and pick up artists have so much FAIL in their and their students lives is...

they teach you what to say...

And you have to THINK.

And therefore, it becomes about YOU and what is in your mind...when the real pick up artists...dont think...they just do.

And that happens when it is about THEM, shining a spotlight on them and making them the star...

why or why oh why is this so hard to understand??????

Selling, persuasion, seduction, marketing, isn't about what you think...

My mantra for many many years has been, your opinion of me is none of my business, even if you give it to me...in one ear, out the other...like a duck in water...cold storm or summer mist...it rolls off my back...

meditate on it...it's not about you....

it is about them.

again.

gja

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