For Losers Only: A Solution To Your #1 "Catch-22"

TW,

Yes, evidence is the key. For maybe 30% of the population, evidence that others are successful is enough for them to believe. For the rest of us ... I used to look at THAT evidence and be hopeful, but I was not them. From the days when I struck out about 15 times in a row in Little League, I had a ton of evidence that success would never happen for me.

I hit a point which most people hit where you consistently expect to not be successful. And, of course, that is how it worked, and my belief in myself would only decrease. Then my activity would slow to a crawl, to be sure I didn't make more mistakes.

But when I studied and came to understand and practice the idea of testing, my mental state flipped. NOW I could expect to lose every time, and there was no sting, so long as I learned and got better. Evidence began to gather that I could do something right - test and learn and get better. I developed 100% confidence - total belief - that I could make enough mistakes so that I would clearly define what did not work.

And once I believed I could do that, I got bolder, I made mistakes faster, and I hit on some things that actually worked. That gave me evidence that I could do it ... which I never believed before.

Sure, I could be wrong ... but I don't think so. I think for most people, evidence that SOMEONE can do it is not evidence that THEY can do it. They know they lack confidence. They know they can't be successful unless they believe. But they can't truly believe until they have real evidence that they themselves can be successful.

But if you have a "testing" attitude, then, ridiculously, failure becomes evidence of success. And I believed I could fail like rolling off a log, so that worked really well for me.

Richard

"They don't believe they will ever achieve what they really want in life"

I'd believe you if you said

"They don't know what they really want in (or from) life".

That to me is where most people are at. They don't have a clue as to what they want.

This country was designed and to a degree is still designed for Average Joe Schmuck to be as successful as he so desires. Just ask the cowboys schlocking their latest greatest make a million IM package.

That concept is still mentioned in schools maybe not to the degree it was when you and I (born 1945) were surfing our way through the system.

I have re-read this thread and get another sense/thought. The man has his boot on my neck - remember that from the 60's? - so I can't get ahead.

No, sorry the man doesn't have his boot on your neck. You have your boot on your neck. If a pure clutz from the boonies of NY can figure it out by simple observation, so can you.

Now, go take off your boots, stand up and try. And for the rest of you, shut up and quit making excuses for him. Hell, who knows he might grow up and become president, be awarded the nobel prize, take over the auto industry, give his banker friends tons of money, become an expert in the art of the teleprompter and win a second term.

Some people will tell you in the beginning was the word. Not true. In the beginning was a thought. Look what one guy did with a thought.

OK, enough of me. I'm on my way to Pyramid Lake to look at flying fish. I know they are there because my Paiute friend, Pete, told me he saw them. Pete usually has clear vision in matters of flying fish and success.

He runs a chain of 6 cigarette stores and visits the same watering hole I've been known to frequent on a semi-often basis.

I think I'll write a book and call it Wisdom From the Watering Hole...

I see what you mean about the testing aspect.

Let's apply that to the old fleas in a jar story.

(that is the science experiment about the fleas in a jar with the LID ON. They soon learn they cannot jump past the lid (in trying to escape). After they learn this, you can remove the lid + the fleas with STILL not escape. They have given up trying! -- This idea is also expressed with the elephant on a chain example -- attach a strong chain to the baby elephant's leg, then after it learns it cannot break free, you can use a thin rope for the rest of the elephant's life -- because, hey, an elephant never forgets.)

So... with the testing notion, you can add that all of the previous failures need to be constantly *RE*-tested!

Make sense?

-- TW